funny response to are you still alive funny response to are you still alive

In fact, they're taking too much of it. Depending on your mood and relationship with the person, you can go one of many ways. Nice and dandy, like cotton candy. I am high-quality, 100% plant-fed. Watch the video: Only 1 percent of our visitors get these 3 grammar questions right 30 Best Responses To An Apology For A Late Reply. Nasty comebacks dont require a lot of wit; instead, these will land your target flat on their back and wallowing in self pity. The next time the cat gets your tongue, heres a big list of good, witty, nasty, funny sarcastic and clever comebacks for every conversation, no matter where you are! Alright so far, but there is plenty of time for things to get bad. Tell her that you're there for her to make her laugh, if she needs some company. It is a humorous way of saying they have not heard from you in a while. 18. Its better to be single with high standards than be in a relationship settling for less. Im a little busy right now, but Id love the chance to ignore you some other time. There are nosy people everywhere! But, whats the likelihood of that happening? Another excuse that people use is Im just hoping in the shower. 1. Well, Im hoping its going to get a lot better, I cant lie. If receiving a text from your ex elicits strong negative feelings, it is best not to respond. Voltaire (philosopher), "As you get older, three things happen. Thats because I only enjoy long, romantic walks to the fridge. Your friends will expect you to say "fine" or "good," so shake things up by providing an unexpected answer. Now, I understand why some animals eat their young. She works with her clients to help them evolve in their problem areas and find new meaning in their lives, thus finding the best versions of themselves. I will leave that up to your imagination. Edgar A Shoaff (author), "Death is a very narrow theme, but it reaches a wide audience." You don't need to miss them, because you are willing to travel to them, and kiss them. What if questions can help you form connections fast, but you don't want to rush or force it. "The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.9% of them are made by people who are still alive." HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. WHY!? There are many other euphemisms you could use, though: Still ticking. Funny responses to "How are you?" Photo courtesy of Canva. Thats because my crush is a fictional character. Because it sounds like some kind of automated message. Have you met food? This one could be a funny or cute response to sorry for a late reply, based on how they take it. Sarcastic response: Express the appropriate level of enthusiasm, then let this handsome, cheeky British man (aka Jimmy from You're The Worst) do the talking: 3. 16. It's impossible for things to be perfect. and our Not so much. 2023 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. A truly stinging sarcastic response to I love you. No one will expect to hear it, so you'll be catching your friends off guard. You don't want to be rude, but it's okay to give them a little sarcasm by using this phrase. Here's a 13-second video explaining how Jennifer Lawrence uses this Surprise Theory: Do you want the short or the detailed version? I'm glad to know that you're alive.". This way, youre insulting themand they just might be dumb enough not to notice. Norman Wisdom (comedian), "I have lost friends, some by death, others through their sheer inability to cross the street." Here are 55 funny coronavirus memes that will make you LOL. The 'Sex And The City' Cab Light Theory, Revisited, It's Hot When People Call You By Your Last Name, I Never Feel Older Than When I Try To Make A TikTok, Get Even More From Bustle Sign Up For The Newsletter. Talk is cheapbut then again, so are you. Sarcastic Captions for Instagram. Well, Im married to our lord and savior, Jesus Christ. I guess what Im trying to say is, pick your response carefully based on who youre talking to. If I had a tail, I would wag it! My bad, its just your mouth. 25. More like give me a sign that you're still alive. Best 45 seconds of my life. I dont feel that great, but look! Your 3rd @ has one shot to make a three or you die. Synonyms for Still Alive (other words and phrases for Still Alive). Socioeconomically? 14. 5. 38. But, you should know that, I don't like you, already. Some people spend all their time on their phone. Sometimes, being emotional stops us from replying to the messages of others. 5. Im quite certain that Im single because I didnt forward those chain messages stating: forward this to 10 people and you will meet the love of your life in 10 days, or else you suffer bad luck in the past. Same thing youre doing, talking to you now. Keep asking and maybe one day youll get a sensible answer. Id love to give you a nasty look, but it appears you already have one. You are waiting for their reply, and they should be aware of this. 16. 11. Some good old fashioned sarcasm, there is nothing wrong with it. Use sarcasm to let them know that you do not approve. Id love to insult you, but you probably wouldnt understand. While using humor and creativity in your responses is fun, ensure you steer clear from using puns related to religion and sensitive topics. Financially? If you are in a coma, then that is a valid excuse for not texting back. (Explained). 37. but that was before I read Fred's comment below. I havent met the right one yet. Not bad. With Tenor, maker of GIF Keyboard, add popular Are You Still Alive animated GIFs to your conversations. 2 I ask for your birth chart one time, and suddenly, I'm a mind-reading witch that knows what you're thinking. Thank you Fred. If your crush asks you how you are, you might as well be honest. Otherwise, we would still be with them today. 54. In a coma, you still have brain function, which doctors can measure by observing electrical activity and your reactions to external stimuli. 101. I hope you are at your best too. However, we wouldn't recommend you to overdone your sarcasm. The answer is simple. 9. My only talent is not being in a relationship. Usually, people live and learn. This one is good. If they insist that they are bad at replying, you should unfollow them, because you are bad at following people who are bad at replying. How are you? could be much more than a basic question, but we tend to stick to the same old, half-hearted responses. Are those space pants? 100. Hello, how are you? 10. You look tired. Mark Twain (author), "I like sleeping; it's like death without the commitment." Too early to say, it hasnt finished yet. I had been dead for billions of years before I was born and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience. Mark Twain (author), Im not afraid to die, I just dont want to be there when it happens. Woody Allen (comedian), The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. Dave Barry (author), Always go to other peoples funerals, otherwise they wont come to yours. Yogi Berra (baseball player), Im very pleased to be here. original sound - Tyren Sams. I thought you already knew you were a sociopath. TikTok video from Mark Winston (@markwinstonbball): "Are you still alive? Sarcastic comebacks come in handy any time someone is behaving in a particularly annoying way. Better than most, but maybe not as well as others. I have a feeling that my soulmate is somewhere out there pushing a pull door right now. The only thing offending me right now is your face. Yup, I dont share it. More like, How I Met That Jerk I Quickly Forgot About. Is it your job to spread ignorance? What's your sign? Theyre incapacitated when it comes to sending a simple text, yet they can Insta their whole day. You dont need to say it. Giving witty and interesting responses instead of the generic Im fine is often the smartest way to kickstart a nice conversation after the greeting How Are You?. Just because you're using the "what if" format doesn't mean you can ask anything. This is a good response to throw out there. Who knows, maybe you can steer a conversation in a more intriguing path. This is perhaps not for the faint-hearted. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future. You should really come with a warning label. 35. So, how does average sound? I am doing a bit better than before, but not nearly as awesome as I am going to be. I always yawn when Im interested. I only fall in love with anime characters. Hope this status quo persists for the rest of the day.". 18. Socioeconomically? Youre like Monday: no one likes you. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Some Funny Responses to Everyday Questions. 2. Often, we text some people when were at rock bottom, to try and get their help, or just have someone to talk to. The government? Mentally? As geeky as it is, this funny response to I love you has got to make you chuckle. Me being single is just a conspiracy! 91. Your question is registered, we will answer when in the mood. I am not sure what you mean. 39 Heartfelt Poems For Your Mom On Her Birthday, Mom And Daughter Relationship: Everything You Need To Know, 150 Special Ways To Wish Your Long-Distance Girlfriend On Her Birthday, 39 Long-Distance Love Letters To Show Your Love For Him, 51 Good Morning Messages For Her In A Long-Distance Relationship, 24 Beautiful And Touching Poems For People In Long-Distance Relationships, 15 Most Important Things In A Relationship, 61 Great Long-Distance Friendship Quotes And Sayings, 9 Important Qualities Of A Healthy And Happy Relationship. Sort of. 83. Lets just say if I was a Pokmon, my ability would be Oblivious., Listen, that feeling we call love is just a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed. Maybe because I have a Ph.D. in impatience. 81. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. So, it might be wise to double-check theyre still alive before you complain. Great, but I should warn you that I am totally biased. I favour the "How am I what?" This was one of the quickest ways there was to send a message from one person to another. You want to make them laugh, not yell. Hence, you may need to put in some effort to keep the conversation flowing. 1. count_scoopula 6 yr. ago. (Say it like he or. If ugliness was measured in bricks, I would be the Great Wall of China. If they are not going to reply, perhaps the archaeologists who discover their phone will. I don't want to give off the wrong impression.". Here are some of the most humorous replies to "How are you? Speak Now Or Forever Hold Your Peace: What Does It Mean? Stop joking! Life is up to something. Financially? Why do you ask? Suppose you're about to join a group when they stop by and ask if you want to join. 2. Youre not really expecting them to write you an essay. 6. 12. Im not single. Do you like nature, despite what it did to you? 382 Likes, 344 Comments. Share the best GIFs now >>> Alexa's response: I'm sorry, Dave. Then the worms eat you. This one is a bit depressing, which is why you should watch when you use it. Relationships, Marriage, Couples, Grief, Life Coaching, Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner, Relationships, Beauty & Lifestyle, Health & Wellness, Infographic: Tips To Continue A Conversation After Responding To How Are You. But sometimes sending a little message before excommunication can give you the confidence boost you need to dropkick them from your mind for forever. If your best friends are worrying about you due to your new break up, this one you can use to make them feel relaxed. Im not ready to share my food with anyone yet. How do you get it to curl out of your nostrils like that? Be Thankful To Be Alive Quotes. 2. Just standing here waiting for stupid questions I guess. (This line came from the cartoon show. "If it looks like I give a damn, please tell me. [Read: How to be funny and make people love your company]. That's boyfriend material. I thought I had the flu, but then I realized your face makes me sick to my stomach. The data will take longer to reach Earth than it would if it was sent from someone on Earth. Theres this one time when a cute guy/gal asked me if I have a boyfriend/girlfriend and I said yes because I didnt hear the question. 77. Trying to remember the name of that weird person you remind me of. I have a gold watch that belonged to him. "Accept the facts for what they are, and be grateful you're not being strung along or played.". Your secrets are always safe with me. Im too expensive. Everyone always thinks being asked how you are means your health or a general standing-but what about if it isn't? Its because I always show up on dates with bottles of wine for myself. But half the time, it is a nightmare. 17. Hanging on. Wondering How You Are 1 I'm Better on the inside than I Look on the outside This one works well when you're still in your pajamas or are having a bad hair day. I firmly believe that a romantic relationship is a huge distraction. Maybe they had a giant project at work and lost contact with all their friends and loved ones. Brian OldWolf (author) from Troon on July 30, 2020: Yes, this is a very witty, funny article. Yes, believe it or not, it really does happen. Going strong. Totally fine! This just in: Bad communication skills are not trending this season! Stand still, so I can hit you with my truck. If you're really feeling them, you can give them one last chance to make up for their communication lag. It doesn't mean that you don't actually take showers. Voice command: Alexa, open the pod bay doors. Perhaps you said something as egregious as Hey. You grow on peoplebut then again, so does cancer. Then they throw dirt in your face. Susan Winter, relationship expert, and bestselling author, This article was originally published on Dec. 15, 2020. 73. What an impertinent question to ask a girl! If I wanted to commit suicide, Id climb your ego and jump to your IQ level. Your relationship status is your business alone (and your partners, if you have one). 350 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic. 36. but it's just so blunt and funny. Its not my choice, but its still a choice. Chuck Bass? Discover what these funny, yet morbid, jokes about burial and death have in common in this hilarious piece about "Alive Jokes". 43. StyleCraze provides content of general nature that is designed for informational purposes only. It lets him know that you love spending time together. Did someone leave your cage open? Have a nice life." This text is excellent because you are making him or her feel guilty about ghosting you. Some people are going to find your witty responses funny, and some people arent. Dont let your mind wander. I see youve chosen this time to humiliate yourself in public. It's best to say when you're in a horrible situation, like in a class you can't stand. For your information, Im in a relationship with food. 65.